On Maturity

I have come out of retirement–and moved to new digs–because my brain has been churning away today.

A lot has changed in the two years since I last posted a blog post.  New living situation (twice so far), new relationship, new positions at work (twice so far).  Rather than go into the nitty gritty, I’d prefer to write on what’s been on my mind.

You see, I’ve struggled for all of my adult life with actually feeling like an adult.  And, frankly, I can’t say I feel like one yet.  But I’m getting there, thanks in no small part to wise words that have been imparted to me in my times of personal panic.  What I have realized, though, is that maturity has absolutely nothing to do with your age and everything to do with how you choose to present yourself.

Maturity doesn’t mean knowing what to do in every situation.  Maturity doesn’t mean liking everyone and everything.  Maturity doesn’t mean not acting goofy or not making terrible, off-color jokes or not dressing up like Thor if Thor were a 50s housewife.

Maturity means treating others with respect.  It means not assuming that anyone at all owes you anything at all.  Maturity means knowing that you don’t know everything and allowing yourself to reach out for answers.  Maturity means knowing when it’s okay to act like a child and when it’s time to put the child in a safe place for the time being.

Most importantly, maturity means realizing that if things aren’t going the way you want them to in your life, it’s very likely not someone else’s fault.  Especially if they never seem to go your way.

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If you have kids…

Do you ever dream of what they will be when they grow up?  Do you get the inclination to lead them in a certain direction?  What if I told you there was a very good chance you could affect their future, without seeming like you’re nagging or pushing?lg-school_desk

At lunch today we got on the topic of childhood playthings.  My boss mentioned that her best friend growing up had a school desk and they always played school.  One breath later, she said “And I had a cardboard grocery store.  There I was, my first retail experience.”

play_grocery_store

I was completely joking, but I asked if her friend became a teacher.  Sure enough, she did.  I thought about it long and hard.  The only thing (aside from Barbies, Littlest Pet Shops, and My Little Ponies, which I consider universal and inconsequential) I had that was truly my own and not a hand-me-down was my sewing machine.  So now I sew.

I’m interested in whether this works for other people as well.  What did you play with as a kid?  What did you become when you grew up?